Today I’m unveiling a new feature here on the site called Off The Plate. This feature will be about non grapes on plate news, events, and other such-and-such from wherever-dom.
Our inaugural OTP will feature Taco Bell’s new Cantina Taco. Although I have favorites at most restaurants (OK, calling Taco Bell a restaurant is a stretch), I always try new menu items. You never know, you might find a new favorite… or you might find the Cantina Taco.
For those of you who’ve been blessed and HAVEN’T tried the Cantina Taco, let me describe it to you:
The two moisturelss, turn-to-paste-as-you-eat-them corn tortillas that crack and splinter like The Mummy’s foreskin at a Thai strip club are filled with slimy meat seasoned with the sweat of an outsourced IT call center and topped off with half a pound of cilantro.
American Civil War era hardtack is more appetizing.
How bad are the Cantina Tacos? First, it’s been about month since I tried said tacos and I still can’t think of the Taco Bell brand without my stomach turning. Second, I can’t think of ANY Mexican food without my stomach turning. Third, it took me a month to write this piece because every time I started working on it, my stomach started turning. Finally, they were so bad I created a special feature on my website just to warn the populous.
Does this mean you won’t try them again?
It’s great to find an epxert who can explain things so well
Hmmm … does this mean no more Taco Bell because it makes your stomach turn? Now you know how your friends feel when you eat Taco Bell!!
I think you know how to write a definitely good post. Thanks!
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