Headline of the Day: Navy Bombs Guam With Dead Frozen Mice

I’ve posted them before, but as I promised way back when, interesting headlines aren’t regular features here at The Grape. But this one couldn’t go without reporting. Seems we’re loading dead mice up with drugs to kill a non-indigenous snake that’s eating all the indigenous critters. My favorite sentence in the piece is reference the ordinance’s (dead, drugged mice) delivery method:

“By outfitting the mice with cardboard wings and green party streams, the bait could float down to the jungle and catch on the branches.”

Wow, lot to work with there.

First, what’s up with the party streamers? Were there streamers at the party when they slipped these poor mice the roofies, or were they just trying to humiliate them post mortem?

Second, why didn’t they just drug flying squirrels and save us tax payers a few bucks on cardboard wings?

Finally, weren’t there some starving gorillas they could have imported or aren’t winters cold enough in Guam?