Off the Plate: Be Prepared… You Could Choose How I Die!

As many of you know, I’ve been allergic to peanuts for about 3-4 years. Well, long story short, I’ve recently had two tests that have come back negative (which, is a positive). That means, in about a month, I’ll be tested yet again and, if that goes well, I may be cleared to eat peanuts. I stress may, because I could fail this final test. So, assuming it does go well, I figured I’d let the readers decide which food I try first (if I do fail my test, I’ll make the the food I eat on my deathbed). Since there’s a lot of flopping soccer going on, I thought we’d have tournament style voting. See below for the brackets, and vote early and often! I’ll leave the voting up for a few days…

Candy Bracket

  1. Snickers
  2. Reece’s Peanut Butter Cups
  3. Take 5
  4. Peanut m&m’s

Restaurant Bracket

  1. Dairy Queen
  2. Five Guys
  3. Pad Thai (from one of several locales)
  4. Texas Roadhouse

Pastry Bracket

  1. Tony’s Donuts
  2. Scratch Bakery
  3. That place down the road that I hear has really good cream horns, but I don’t really care for cream horns so I’ll probably get a raspberry turnover
  4. Dunkin’ Donuts

Supermarket Bracket

  1. Nutter Butter
  2. Honey Roasted Peanuts
  3. Fluffernutter
  4. Kellogg’s Crunchy Nut Cereal

Peanut Bracket

They’ll be a new poll every day, so… choose wisely!!! Are you ready?

Rise to vote sir!

[socialpoll id=”2207452″]

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We’re Back From Vacation

You’d think that since I was on vacation, I’d have more time to dedicate to the site and posts would be free flowin’. There are two issues with that line of thought. First, since I’m not at work, I’m not in stores or looking at the ads that give me inspiration. Second, when I’m on vacation I’m on vacation (well, in addition to entertaining a seven year old). Now that I’m back at work, let the posts resume!

Our first image was taken by a colleague of mine while visiting a supermarket down south. A few fans of this site may recognize these signs (since they either live in the area or may actually work there). I find this sign amusing because I’m not sure if it’s an error or not.Maybe they really are trying to say that if I’m not 200% satisfied with the quality, they’ll double my money back. I’m just not sure one can ever been 200% satisfied.

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Next up we have a new, more risque offering at Taco Bell. That’s some interesting cherry placement on an interestingly shaped frozen drink. Diabetics beware! Those are some pretty dark berries, so it’s probably pretty sweet juice.

 

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Speaking of Taco Bell…they sell Churros. But their churros aren’t filled with “barbarian cream”… at least I hope they’re not. That last image makes me wonder…

 

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Glorious Day!

What’s so glorious about it, you ask? Well, we’ve got some new images, for one. For two… well, I was mostly just tired of basically saying “image time” every Monday. Especially since I’ve only been posting on Monday’s lately thanks to that jerk Malthael. First up, we have this lovely collection of hair products. Reading from left to right, they just get more ridiculous. I’m assuming all of these are for thicker, fuller hair (I’m smart like that), but Mane n’ Tail? Is that what you ladies are going for when you do your hair in the morning? A lustrous mane?

 

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Next up, we have Captain Morgan’s boss: Admiral Nelson. Someone’s getting sued.

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Finally, we have a mango juice which, apparently, isn’t as good for you as mangos.

 

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Image Time!

Sometimes things you see every week and never notice them. Take, for example, exhibit a: the red pepper scream. I cut up peppers just about every week and I’ve never noticed how… painful the process was to them. The second image, I can assure you, was the first time I’d seen this block in a supermarket flyer. I’m not sure what “The Healthing” is (Heal Thing?), but it sounds like a John Romero movie or something…

 

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No Flowers For You…

But we do have another three images for you this fine Monday.

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